by Max Barry

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Most Eco-Friendly Governments: 1,351stMost Advanced Public Education: 1,479thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,800th
The Utopia of
New York Times Democracy
Life's A Beach
Influence
Power
Region
Civil Rights
Good
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Superb

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Beach

Population9.464 billion

CapitalThe Bonfire
LeaderThe Beach Bum
FaithThe Beach

Currencysand dollar
Animaldolphin

The Utopia of The Beach is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by The Beach Bum with a fair hand, and notable for its state-planned economy, irreverence towards religion, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, democratic population of 9.464 billion Beachians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The large, corrupt, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Bonfire. The average income tax rate is 93.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Beachian economy, worth a remarkable 1,473 trillion sand dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 155,659 sand dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

Beachians have replaced bears in a popular idiom, there has been a rapid increase of noise complaints over the sound of buzzing bees, a National Academy regulates grammar and usage, and every new building project has to undergo a five-year environmental impact study before it can go ahead. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Beach's national animal is the dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is The Beach.

The Beach is ranked 290,859th in the world and 23rd in The Beach for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens, with 36.45 Whatever.

Top
1%
Most Eco-Friendly Governments: 1,351stMost Advanced Public Education: 1,479thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,800thLargest Publishing Industry: 2,268thBest Weather: 2,681stTop
5%
Rudest Citizens: 4,028thHighest Food Quality: 4,264thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 4,498thMost Cultured: 4,675thMost Developed: 4,746thMost Inclusive: 4,995thSmartest Citizens: 5,570thMost Pacifist: 6,047thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 6,804thMost Rebellious Youth: 6,832ndHighest Average Tax Rates: 6,888thLargest Governments: 8,696thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 10,307thMost Valuable International Artwork: 10,685thSafest: 10,950thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 11,262ndMost Cheerful Citizens: 12,813thLowest Crime Rates: 13,062ndHighest Economic Output: 14,565thHighest Average Incomes: 14,728thMost Secular: 14,840thTop
10%
Nicest Citizens: 17,597thMost Compassionate Citizens: 19,438thLargest Information Technology Sector: 20,147thMost Scientifically Advanced: 20,565thMost Influential: 21,129thLongest Average Lifespans: 21,297thMost Stationary: 21,340thHighest Poor Incomes: 21,732ndMost Efficient Economies: 21,879thHighest Drug Use: 23,243rdLargest Welfare Programs: 23,844thLargest Retail Industry: 26,629th
Top
5%
Most Inclusive: 1st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 1st in the regionMost Developed: 1st in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 1st in the regionSmartest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Drug Use: 1st in the regionMost Pacifist: 1st in the regionBest Weather: 1st in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1st in the regionHighest Food Quality: 1st in the regionMost Stationary: 1st in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionTop
10%
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionMost Influential: 2nd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 2nd in the regionLargest Governments: 2nd in the regionMost Cultured: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 2nd in the regionSafest: 2nd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 2nd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, every new building project has to undergo a five-year environmental impact study before it can go ahead.
  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, a National Academy regulates grammar and usage.
  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, there has been a rapid increase of noise complaints over the sound of buzzing bees.
  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, Beachians have replaced bears in a popular idiom.
  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, town nameplates frequently raise giggles from passing tourists.
  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, mantis shrimp studies is academia's fastest-growing field.
  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, pet owners must make a payment if their charges leave a deposit.
  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, nobody is allowed to stop the local daycare from reading Nietzsche to pre-schoolers.
  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, aspiring authors begrudgingly help proofread issue submissions (The Beach has found 2 easter eggs).
  • : Following new legislation in The Beach, the "war on terror" doesn't seem to be making Beachians any less frightened.

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