by Max Barry

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Most Devout: 4,963rdMost Armed: 6,031stHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 6,430th
The Community of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Get off my lawn
Influence
Minnow
Region
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Powerhouse
Political Freedom
Rare

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Ausones

Population692 million

CapitalTerintanheed

Currencyturd
Animaljackal

The Community of The Ausones is a huge, efficient nation, notable for its deadly medical pandemics, public floggings, and unlimited-speed roads. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 692 million Ausonians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Administration, Spirituality, and Industry also on the agenda, while Education receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Terintanheed. The average income tax rate is 73.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Ausonian economy, worth 63.1 trillion turds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Book Publishing, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 91,191 turds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Foragers descend on national cemeteries for 'all-you-can-dig-up' extravaganzas, the government is known to care more about its buildings than its people, the price of freedom is about half a million turds, and stealing from a clothesline is a serious offence. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. The Ausones's national animal is the jackal, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

The Ausones is ranked 301,015th in the world and 9,253rd in the Pacific for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring zero on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.

Top
5%
Most Devout: 4,963rdMost Armed: 6,031stHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 6,430thMost Ignorant Citizens: 6,784thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 7,397thFattest Citizens: 7,559thMost Primitive: 11,142ndLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 13,275thTop
10%
Most Cheerful Citizens: 16,493rdMost Advanced Public Transport: 17,626thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 19,963rdMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 22,235thMost Patriotic: 23,103rdHighest Poor Incomes: 23,126thHighest Average Tax Rates: 24,239thMost Corrupt Governments: 24,574thMost Subsidized Industry: 25,167thMost Cultured: 27,677th
Top
1%
Most Armed: 89th in the regionMost Devout: 92nd in the regionTop
5%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 99th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 140th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 148th in the regionFattest Citizens: 148th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 190th in the regionMost Primitive: 209th in the regionLargest Black Market: 245th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 277th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 327th in the regionMost Patriotic: 372nd in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 375th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 383rd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 418th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 465th in the regionTop
10%
Highest Poor Incomes: 528th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 552nd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 587th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 606th in the regionMost Cultured: 625th in the regionLargest Governments: 683rd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 838th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 888th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, stealing from a clothesline is a serious offence.
  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, the price of freedom is about half a million turds.
  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, the government is known to care more about its buildings than its people.
  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, foragers descend on national cemeteries for 'all-you-can-dig-up' extravaganzas.
  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, the Party has more splits than a yo-yo dieter's trousers.
  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, the police are destroying all photographic evidence of their own existence.
  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, after every storm there's an expensive government-funded rainbow.
  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, chess hooliganism is on the rise after the banning of organised sports.
  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, relatives of recent award winners find their trophies make stylish urns.
  • : Following new legislation in The Ausones, the long arm of the law possesses a rather slow hand.

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