by Max Barry

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Highest Workforce Participation Rate: 5,305thMost Pacifist: 6,976thSafest: 9,257th
The Community of
Left-wing Utopia
If you can't love yourself, how the hell you gonna love
Civil Rights
World Benchmark
Political Freedom

Overview Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Telgan Alpha

Population1.425 billion

CapitalThe Werk Room

CurrencyRuPeter Badge

The Community of Telgan Alpha is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by RuPaul with a fair hand, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, unlimited-speed roads, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 1.425 billion Telgan Alphans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Werk Room. The average income tax rate is 71.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Telgan Alphan economy, worth 104 trillion RuPeter Badges a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Basket Weaving. Average income is 73,430 RuPeter Badges, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The army lures cannon fodder with promises of a college education, the new national campaign exhorts men to "Show Some Class - Don't Sit On Your Ass", houses and businesses are bulldozed to make way for ever-expanding cemeteries, and the government's official stance on religion is that it is so very silly. Crime is totally unknown. Telgan Alpha's national animal is the Queens, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Ruanism.

Telgan Alpha is ranked 244,773rd in the world and 336th in Philosophers for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens, with 33.44 Whatever.

Highest Workforce Participation Rate: 5,305thMost Pacifist: 6,976thSafest: 9,257thLeast Corrupt Governments: 9,711thNudest: 10,125thLargest Welfare Programs: 10,451stMost Influential: 10,486thMost Compassionate Citizens: 10,665thMost Inclusive: 10,864thNicest Citizens: 11,268thTop
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 16,703rdHighest Food Quality: 17,628thMost Politically Free: 18,434thSmartest Citizens: 18,782ndMost Secular: 19,336thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 19,481stLongest Average Lifespans: 21,174thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 22,004thMost Advanced Public Transport: 22,313thHealthiest Citizens: 23,369thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 23,585thMost Advanced Public Education: 24,828th
Most Influential: 1st in the regionTop
Most Stationary: 4th in the regionMost Politically Free: 5th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 6th in the regionNudest: 9th in the regionMost Inclusive: 10th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 12th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 12th in the regionSafest: 13th in the regionMost Pacifist: 15th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 17th in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 17th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 17th in the regionTop
Least Corrupt Governments: 18th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 18th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 20th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 20th in the regionHighest Food Quality: 21st in the regionNicest Citizens: 21st in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 21st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 22nd in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 22nd in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 23rd in the regionRudest Citizens: 23rd in the regionMost Secular: 23rd in the regionLargest Governments: 25th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 25th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 26th in the regionLargest Populations: 26th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 27th in the regionMost Extreme: 29th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 31st in the regionBest Weather: 32nd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 33rd in the region

National Happenings

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