The Free Land of Tekoomse is a colossal, socially progressive nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape and avant-garde cinema. The hard-working, democratic population of 8.684 billion Tekoomseans live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The tiny government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Administration. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.3%.

The very strong Tekoomsean economy, worth 528 trillion Tobaccos a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Woodchip Exports industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Average income is 60,876 Tobaccos, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 216,342 per year while the poor average 12,341, a ratio of 17.5 to 1.

The "Underwear of Women in Power" issue of The Tekoomse City Times is sold out, deceased politicians' MyFace profiles are unanimously pro-incumbent, prison reforms have replaced communal luaus with communal loos, and throwing garbage out of your house's front window makes it legally someone else's problem. Crime is a problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Tekoomse's national animal is the Spirit Animal, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Tekoomse is ranked 183,414^th in the world and 15^th in Turtle Island for Most Patriotic, with 7.67 flags saluted per person per day.