The Elothera Dapeda of Talamia is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Solionj Divenantio with a fair hand, and notable for its teetotalling pirates, smutty television, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 5.449 billion Talamians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal government prioritizes Education, with Administration, Environment, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Defense receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Clinepalas. The average income tax rate is 92.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Talamian economy, worth 592 trillion Crematas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is extremely specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 108,736 Crematas, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The Museum of Blackacrean War Crimes is located on "Blackacre Did Nothing Wrong Avenue", Solionj Divenantio is called 'Patches' at international summits, hostage-takers offer loyalty scheme points for prompt payment, and military strategists are questioning the wisdom of subsidizing the economies of sworn enemies. Crime is totally unknown. Talamia's national animal is the Hoopoe, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Talamia is ranked 238,481^st in the world and 119^th in Democratic Socialist Assembly for Most Armed, with 0.14 Weapons Per Person.