The Kingdom of Spifftopiania is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by God King Spiff with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, enslaved workforce, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.271 billion Spifftopians are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The relatively small, corrupt, pro-business government prioritizes Defense, although Industry, Law & Order, and Spirituality are also considered important, while Social Policy and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Spifftopia. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 22.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Spifftopianian economy, worth 622 trillion spiffcoins a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 190,231 spiffcoins, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,602,836 per year while the poor average 4,227, a ratio of 379 to 1.

Military doctrine says not to open fire until you see the "beady little eyes" of Johnny Foreigner, calling tech support mid-shootout is a common occurrence, Spifftopianian doors require a Ph.D. to open, and home education can sometimes be a load of bullocks. Crime is a major problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Spifftopiania's national animal is the tea, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is teaism.

Spifftopiania is ranked 2,866^th in the world and 93^rd in The North Pacific for Fattest Citizens, with 35.52 Obesity Rate.