by Max Barry

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Most Valuable International Artwork: 1,277thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 3,516thMost Influential: 3,989th
The Church of
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Twirling Toward Freedom
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population8.451 billion

LeaderThe great Dong


The Church of Slongs is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by The great Dong with an even hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, free-roaming dinosaurs, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed population of 8.451 billion Slongsians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kongo. The average income tax rate is 71.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Slongsian economy, worth 727 trillion marks a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Cheese Exports. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 86,078 marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Blind dates tend to result in bruised shins, mothers are routinely abandoning their children in the name of women's rights, eight-year-olds can be seen lighting up in public areas, and the government regularly reassures citizens that there are no monsters under their beds. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Slongs's national animal is the squirrel, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Bellringing.

Slongs is ranked 44,175th in the world and 1,222nd in The East Pacific for Healthiest Citizens, with 6.08 bananas ingested per day.

Most Valuable International Artwork: 1,277thTop
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 3,516thMost Influential: 3,989thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 7,080thMost Beautiful Environments: 11,831stBest Weather: 11,887thTop
Most Stationary: 15,691stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 16,204thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 17,731stLargest Welfare Programs: 18,726thLongest Average Lifespans: 18,793rdMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 18,912thMost Cultured: 21,578thLargest Black Market: 21,884thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 22,203rdMost Subsidized Industry: 22,338thHighest Poor Incomes: 23,178thMost Developed: 24,823rdMost Advanced Public Education: 25,957th
Most Valuable International Artwork: 37th in the regionTop
Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 221st in the regionMost Influential: 249th in the regionLargest Black Market: 253rd in the regionMost Stationary: 265th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 268th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 349th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 352nd in the regionBest Weather: 375th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 417th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 441st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 484th in the regionTop
Largest Populations: 506th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 514th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 572nd in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 589th in the regionMost Cultured: 590th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 608th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 643rd in the regionMost Developed: 662nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 668th in the regionMost Average: 694th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 731st in the regionMost Patriotic: 801st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 833rd in the regionLargest Governments: 857th in the regionHighest Food Quality: 920th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 937th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 960th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,003rd in the region

National Happenings

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