The Greater Republic of Sargossa is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by General Gregorio Emparán with an iron fist, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, anti-smoking policies, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 28.485 billion Sargossans are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Education also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Soluca. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 2.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Sargossan economy, worth a remarkable 8,655 trillion dinaras a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an amazing 303,845 dinaras, with the richest citizens earning 7.5 times as much as the poorest.

Military minds worry that 'the blue screen of death' on brand new operating systems may be a literal description, teenagers sit around on their butts all day, for some reason the census focuses on daily banana ingestion and hourly quip rate, and General Gregorio Emparán has been nicknamed 'Robomop'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Sargossa's national animal is the Great Manta, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Sargossa is ranked 10,196^th in the world and 10^th in Rushmore for Smartest Citizens, with 91.39 quips per hour.