The Democratic People's Republic of Santa Dystopia is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Kim Yo-jong with an iron fist, and remarkable for its infamous sell-swords, otherworldly petting zoo, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 6.674 billion Dystopianis are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Industry, Education, and Law & Order are also considered important, while Environment and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Rason. The average income tax rate is 67.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Dystopiani economy, worth a remarkable 1,584 trillion shillings a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 237,469 shillings, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Quiet professionalism has returned to the nation's armed forces, Lizard is one of the most popular forenames in Santa Dystopia, small children are learning a lot of new words from a teacher with Tourette Syndrome, and Kim Yo-jong often plays real life games of Tower Defense against hordes of angry villagers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Santa Dystopia's national animal is the lizard, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Santa Dystopia is ranked 299,768^th in the world and 6,979^th in The East Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -364.75 on the Scary Big Number Scale.