The Protectorate of Rebeltopia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Jason Dowling with an iron fist, and remarkable for its compulsory military service, state-planned economy, and enforced nudity. The cynical population of 19.604 billion Rebeltopians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Law & Order, with Administration, Defense, and Education also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Warner. The average income tax rate is 16.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Rebeltopian economy, worth 745 trillion Deutschy-Markies a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, fairly diversified black market in Basket Weaving, Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 38,011 Deutschy-Markies, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.

Dentists routinely perform open heart surgery, the government spends millions of Deutschy-Markies every year prosecuting spammers, stone wrist watches that weigh 20lb are the latest trend, and academics are questioning the quality of the nation's newly-reprinted science textbooks. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Rebeltopia's national animal is the Cow, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is YAY for cake.

Rebeltopia is ranked 128,693^rd in the world and 2,768^th in the South Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 62.85 law-abiding acts per hour.