The Resident CRAZY of Rebel-topia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Jason Dowling with an iron fist, and notable for its public floggings, parental licensing program, and strictly enforced bedtime. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 14.213 billion Rebel-topians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Warner. The average income tax rate is 95.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Rebel-topian economy, worth a remarkable 2,002 trillion Deutschy-Markies a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 140,916 Deutschy-Markies, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Every workday begins with group therapy, it turns out that you actually can put a price on intangible cultural heritage, basic multiplication is all you need to know to have a child, and police pull people off the street for even mentioning the word plane. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Rebel-topia's national animal is the Cow, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Yay For Cake.

Rebel-topia is ranked 134,605^th in the world and 5,821^st in the South Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -163.55 on the Scary Big Number Scale.