by Max Barry

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Rudest Citizens: 830thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1,140thHighest Crime Rates: 1,204th
The Free Land of
Corporate Bordello
Roll Tide Roll
Influence
Superpower
Governor
Region
Civil Rights
Very Good
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
World Benchmark

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Really Big Bama Fan

Population8.097 billion

CapitalTuscaloosa
LeaderThe Head Coach
FaithThe Cult of Saban

CurrencyCrimson
AnimalElephant

The Free Land of Really Big Bama Fan is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by The Head Coach with a fair hand, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, pith helmet sales, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 8.097 billion Really Big Bama Fanians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tuscaloosa. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 1.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Really Big Bama Fanian economy, worth a remarkable 1,511 trillion Crimsons a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 186,723 Crimsons, with the richest citizens earning 6.4 times as much as the poorest.

Blackface performers claim they are being deliberately ironic, the national anthem is considered broadly offensive to those who don't believe in The Cult of Saban, the nation is experiencing a severe shortage of sporting events, and witches' brews set off Geiger counters. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Really Big Bama Fan's national animal is the Elephant, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The Cult of Saban.

Really Big Bama Fan is ranked 22,285th in the world and 1st in SEC Fanatics for Most Cultured, scoring 88 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.

Top
1%
Rudest Citizens: 830thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1,140thHighest Crime Rates: 1,204thLargest Agricultural Sector: 1,690thLargest Retail Industry: 1,788thHighest Disposable Incomes: 2,012thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2,321stHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2,400thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2,666thTop
5%
Most Rebellious Youth: 3,219thFattest Citizens: 3,891stLargest Gambling Industry: 3,998thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 10,126thMost Armed: 10,445thMost Scientifically Advanced: 11,277thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 11,758thHighest Average Incomes: 12,217thLargest Publishing Industry: 12,677thLargest Information Technology Sector: 13,577thMost Beautiful Environments: 14,882ndTop
10%
Smartest Citizens: 16,868thHighest Economic Output: 17,583rdMost Inclusive: 18,816thHighest Food Quality: 19,779thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 22,017thMost Cultured: 22,285thMost Efficient Economies: 23,739thMost Influential: 27,048thMost Stationary: 29,060thMost Politically Free: 30,564th

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