The Federal Republic of Quirrelsit is a huge, genial nation, notable for its museums and concert halls, ubiquitous missile silos, and frequent executions. The hard-working population of 648 million Quirrelsitians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lago Azul Vespeiro. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 73.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Quirrelsitian economy, worth 69.6 trillion Geos a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is an impressive 107,342 Geos, with the richest citizens earning 5.6 times as much as the poorest.

National park visitors are reporting a rash of poison ivy sightings, wishing you had children is considered a sign of child abuse, politicians preface their speeches with a declaration that any resemblance to speeches given by individuals living or dead is purely coincidental, and the nation's infamous boot camp is more brutal than most battlefields. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Quirrelsit's national animal is the Vespas, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Quirrelsit is ranked 285,707^th in the world and 187^th in Union of Allied States for Largest Mining Sector, scoring -7.87 on the Blue Sky Asbestos Index.