The Free Land of Puerto Thelosia is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, renowned for its complete lack of prisons, infamous sell-swords, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, cheerful, devout population of 23.135 billion Puerto Thelosians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The enormous, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of San Esperanza. The average income tax rate is 90.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Puerto Thelosian economy, worth a remarkable 2,198 trillion nyans a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing and Retail. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 95,040 nyans, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Parking's carefree without parking car fees, peace talks occasionally rack up a higher body count than the wars they seek to stop, baby dolls thrown in the trash are a leading cause of panic attacks, and getting an infected tattoo is considered a rite of passage in Puerto Thelosia. Crime is totally unknown. Puerto Thelosia's national animal is the whooping veras, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Puerto Thelosia is ranked 202,499^th in the world and 1,170^th in Europe for Largest Manufacturing Sector, scoring zero on the Gooback-Jerbs Productivity Index.