The United Federal Kingdom of Proto Dacia is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Urs Zia with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, daily referendums, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.222 billion Dacians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sarmisegetuza Regia. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 66.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Proto Dacian economy, worth 372 trillion Galbens a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Tourism. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 115,560 Galbens, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 343,091 per year while the poor average 30,535, a ratio of 11.2 to 1.

School lessons are constantly interrupted by 'teacher needs a break' time, the law forbids arson, murder, and low-quality cheese, teams of painters are converting road signs from horse lengths to kilometers, and frequent fliers are obliged to submit to invasive security procedures by government security. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Proto Dacia's national animal is the Dacian Lynx, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Orthodox Christianity.

Proto Dacia is ranked 318,969^th in the world and 116^th in The Hole To Hide In for Nicest Citizens, with 0.62 average smiles per day.