The People's Republic of Privar is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by General Secretary Hector Hernandez with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 1.665 billion Privarians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Município 0. The average income tax rate is 71.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Privarian economy, worth 118 trillion Rubloes a year, is quite specialized and led by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Arms Manufacturing, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 70,977 Rubloes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it... Privarian satellites can detect it, liberals and conservatives try to disqualify each other's candidates on the grounds that "their ideas would never work in the real world", promising seven years of bad luck leads to seven years of community service, and invasive drug testing is now performed at elementary school sports days. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Privar's national animal is the Anaconda, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Atheism.

Privar is ranked 97,798^th in the world and 331^st in The Leftist Assembly for Most Extreme, scoring 23.88 on the Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index.