The Second Best Fruit on Pizza of Pineappleistania is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Noah with a fair hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, unlimited-speed roads, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 3.573 billion Pineappleistanians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The tiny, corrupt, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and International Aid. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pineapple Pizza Poptropica. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 2.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Pineappleistanian economy, worth 763 trillion pineapples a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Soda Sales. Average income is an amazing 213,722 pineapples, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,928,439 per year while the poor average 2,886, a ratio of 668 to 1.

Young and brooding teens are welcomed with open arms to the Dogwarts School of Strangeness and Sorcery, the saying 'break a leg' is now taken literally, this year's televised Budget Forecast has been cancelled because there was already one last year, and the book "Zen and the Art of Dog Maintenance" is inexplicably a worldwide success. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Pineappleistania's national animal is the pineapple, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is pineappleism.

Pineappleistania is ranked 4,964^th in the world and 137^th in The North Pacific for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 10,923.81 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.