The Free Land of Phtz is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Liberty Stan with an even hand, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, deadly medical pandemics, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 1.645 billion Phtzians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The minute, liberal government, or what there is of one, is dominated by the Department of Healthcare, although Education, Administration, and International Aid are also considered important, while Welfare and Defense are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Phtzbang. The average income tax rate is 4.7%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The strong Phtzian economy, worth 143 trillion Dongoes a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Soda Sales, Gambling, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is 87,179 Dongoes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

Visitors often mistake the toiletplex at music festivals for the main stage, the local custom of Biking With The Cars sends tourists home bemused or in body-bags, men avoid even so much as looking at female colleagues, and weekly religious services often resemble campaign rallies. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Phtz's national animal is the Phoenix, which can occasionally be seen dodging aircraft in the nation's cities, and its national religion is Agnosticism.

Phtz is ranked 143,192^nd in the world and 385^th in Conch Kingdom for Most Patriotic, with 9.21 flags saluted per person per day.