The Dominion of Patriarchic Bliss is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Major Ity with an iron fist, and notable for its closed borders, public floggings, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 6.916 billion Patriarchs are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Education, Law & Order, and Administration also on the agenda, while Welfare and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Patriarch City. The average income tax rate is 96.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Patriarch economy, worth a remarkable 4,098 trillion bitcoins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 592,621 bitcoins, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Motorists must pay to enter inner-cities during peak hours, AI citizens are criticized for being robotic, the realistic depiction of tentacles is on the core syllabus of most art schools, and gene-engineered sewerjacks don't smell but they do stink. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Patriarchic Bliss's national animal is the unicorn, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Bow down to your God-King Major Ity.

Patriarchic Bliss is ranked 268,807^th in the world and 9,498^th in the Pacific for Fattest Citizens, with 5.26 Obesity Rate.