The Unified States of Parenlord is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Boitumelo Breiner with a fair hand, and remarkable for its frequent executions, public floggings, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic population of 8.076 billion Parenlords hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Healthcare, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of White Mountain. The average income tax rate is 81.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Parenlordian economy, worth 863 trillion Parenlordian Dollars a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Trout Farming, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 106,978 Parenlordian Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Tourists are forbidden to enter Native Parenlordian lands, mandatory blunting of cutlery has increased the popularity of soup-based meals, the government sends submarines to retrieve bodies from shipwrecked submarines, and many suspect the government "doth protest too much" with their curiously specific denials of conspiracy theories. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Parenlord's national animal is the Mugger Crocodile, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Polytheism.

Parenlord is ranked 18,837^th in the world and 11^th in Equiterra for Lowest Crime Rates, with 90.7 law-abiding acts per hour.