by Max Barry

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Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 131stLargest Black Market: 543rdMost Corrupt Governments: 562nd
The Grand Republic of
Father Knows Best State
Ortmayer knows best.
Supreme Lord President Ortmayer
Influence
Page
Region
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Rare

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Ortmayerland

Population13.439 billion

CapitalNew Ortmayerland City
LeaderSupreme Lord President Ortmayer
FaithOrtmayerism

CurrencyOrtmayer
AnimalOrtmayer Zebra

The Grand Republic of Ortmayerland is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Supreme Lord President Ortmayer with an iron fist, and remarkable for its smutty television, enslaved workforce, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 13.439 billion Ortmayerlandians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Ortmayerland City. The average income tax rate is 92.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Ortmayerlandian economy, worth a remarkable 4,017 trillion Ortmayers a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Retail, Tourism, Basket Weaving, and Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 298,915 Ortmayers, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.2 times as much as the poorest.

Every spring railroad foundations erode to reveal human remains, children are often punished for the sins of the fathers, national chefs believe that you can eat anything so long as you deep fry it first, and undergrads find their professors' mushroom experiments less psychedelic than expected. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ortmayerland's national animal is the Ortmayer Zebra, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Ortmayerism.

Ortmayerland is ranked 239,515th in the world and 10,583rd in Lazarus for Most Armed, with 0.14 weapons per person.

Top
1%
Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 131stLargest Black Market: 543rdMost Corrupt Governments: 562ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 584thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 629thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 859thLargest Retail Industry: 1,275thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,654thMost Advanced Public Transport: 2,008thMost Devout: 2,112thHighest Average Incomes: 2,189thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2,275thTop
5%
Most Subsidized Industry: 2,712thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,784thHighest Economic Output: 3,258thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 3,430thMost Advanced Public Education: 3,664thLowest Crime Rates: 3,998thLargest Gambling Industry: 4,135thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 4,617thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4,958thRudest Citizens: 4,995thLargest Governments: 5,125thHighest Poor Incomes: 5,367thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 6,091stMost Cultured: 6,113thHighest Average Tax Rates: 6,817thNudest: 7,214thLargest Mining Sector: 7,854thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 7,989thFattest Citizens: 8,651stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 8,744thMost Influential: 9,531stMost Developed: 11,070thMost Beautiful Environments: 11,290thTop
10%
Largest Welfare Programs: 12,777thLargest Publishing Industry: 13,118thMost Patriotic: 13,811thMost Valuable International Artwork: 16,045thMost Efficient Economies: 17,155thLongest Average Lifespans: 19,060thSmartest Citizens: 20,752ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 22,510thLargest Populations: 22,611thHighest Food Quality: 24,623rd
Top
1%
Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 7th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 22nd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 27th in the regionLargest Black Market: 29th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 35th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 38th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 51st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 86th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 102nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 102nd in the regionTop
5%
Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 115th in the regionMost Devout: 121st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 127th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 155th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 159th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 175th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 176th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 217th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 218th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 218th in the regionMost Influential: 222nd in the regionRudest Citizens: 232nd in the regionLargest Governments: 240th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 244th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 271st in the regionNudest: 307th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 309th in the regionMost Cultured: 325th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 364th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 399th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 434th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 444th in the regionFattest Citizens: 450th in the regionTop
10%
Most Developed: 612th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 630th in the regionMost Patriotic: 662nd in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 721st in the regionLargest Populations: 766th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 767th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 813th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 817th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Ortmayerland was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector.
  • : Following new legislation in Ortmayerland, undergrads find their professors' mushroom experiments less psychedelic than expected.
  • : Following new legislation in Ortmayerland, national chefs believe that you can eat anything so long as you deep fry it first.
  • : Following new legislation in Ortmayerland, children are often punished for the sins of the fathers.
  • : Following new legislation in Ortmayerland, every spring railroad foundations erode to reveal human remains.
  • : Following new legislation in Ortmayerland, community-designed sword prostheses are becoming dangerously common.
  • : Ortmayerland was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Highest Food Quality.
  • : Ortmayerland was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector.
  • : Following new legislation in Ortmayerland, the world outside is only known of in folklore.
  • : Ortmayerland was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Fattest Citizens and the Top 10% for Most Patriotic.

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