The Commonwealth of Old Zealand Founder is a huge, efficient nation, remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, absence of drug laws, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 651 million Zealanders are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Industry, Healthcare, and Defense. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.6%.

The powerhouse Zealander economy, worth 56.8 trillion shillings a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with significant contributions from Gambling, Woodchip Exports, and Basket Weaving. Average income is 87,233 shillings, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 407,159 per year while the poor average 11,187, a ratio of 36.4 to 1.

More citizens have access to Maxtopian Grass than clean drinking water, the homeless more often beg for mercy than money, the nation's arms dealers guarantee discretion and untraceable transactions, and cassocked priests and choirboys believe that what happens behind closed doors stays behind closed doors. Crime is a major problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Old Zealand Founder's national animal is the emu, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Old Zealand Founder is ranked 188,741^st in the world and 93^rd in Old Zealand for Longest Average Lifespans, with 61.99 Years.