The Holy Empire of North Insomnia is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Mad Loser with an even hand, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, otherworldly petting zoo, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 5.731 billion North Insomnians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Headachent. The average income tax rate is 98.8%.

The frighteningly efficient North Insomnian economy, worth a remarkable 1,244 trillion piastres a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Tourism. Average income is an amazing 217,165 piastres, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Foreign nations often blame poverty and terrorism on North Insomnian selfishness, the national defense strategy is a little floppy, orphans would rather live their life of luxury than be adopted by prospective parents, and a surprising number of police officers have been arrested for dragon sacrifices. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. North Insomnia's national animal is the dragon, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is ourselves.

North Insomnia is ranked 243,489^th in the world and 7,914^th in The East Pacific for Most Armed, with 0.12 Weapons Per Person.