by Max Barry

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Most Ignorant Citizens: 709th Most Primitive: 1,581st Most World Assembly Endorsements: 1,828th
The Excellence of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Where your civil rights are served with a smile
Civil Rights
Very Strong
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

North Happy Land

Population3.74 billion

CapitalNew Happy City

CurrencyHappy Dollar

The Excellence of North Happy Land is a massive, orderly nation, renowned for its ritual sacrifices, fear of technology, and state-planned economy. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.74 billion Happy Citizens are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Happy City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 82.4%.

The very strong North Happy Landian economy, worth 432 trillion Happy Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Furniture Restoration, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 115,765 Happy Dollars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 389,181 per year while the poor average 25,533, a ratio of 15.2 to 1.

Everyone apparently sends Leader hair-filled lockets, offers to die heroically, and poetic desires to co-parent a child, six-year-old children playing dress-up are viewed with suspicion, player-submitted issues are printed just so they can be burned by [violet] (North Happy Land has found 2 easter eggs), and it's rare to find an unchewed pencil. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. North Happy Land's national animal is the Clownfish, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

North Happy Land is ranked 1,581st in the world and 60th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring 171.95 on the Scary Big Number Scale.

Most Ignorant Citizens: 709thMost Primitive: 1,581stTop
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 1,828thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,948thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,717thMost Devout: 2,900thLargest Black Market: 3,366thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 3,957thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 4,261stLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 4,695thMost Advanced Public Transport: 5,216thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 5,680thMost Avoided: 5,704thMost Corrupt Governments: 6,100thMost Influential: 7,084thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 7,113thTop
Largest Mining Sector: 9,669thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 10,859thHighest Average Tax Rates: 11,589thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 12,524thLargest Governments: 14,497th
Most Ignorant Citizens: 26th in the regionMost Primitive: 60th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 63rd in the regionTop
Largest Black Market: 99th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 102nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 127th in the regionMost Devout: 128th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 154th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 181st in the regionMost Avoided: 196th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 196th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 211th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 233rd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 270th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 368th in the regionTop
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 453rd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 527th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 607th in the regionLargest Governments: 703rd in the region

National Happenings

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