The Glorious Kingdom of North Bernia is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Byleth with an iron fist, and notable for its avant-garde cinema, frequent executions, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 1.213 billion North Bernians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Garreg Mach. The average income tax rate is 77.3%.

The frighteningly efficient North Bernian economy, worth 165 trillion Bernie Badges a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 136,326 Bernie Badges, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.5 times as much as the poorest.

Roads are often attended by round-the-clock construction crews, bouncers at the door of the sweet shop warn five-year-olds not to cause trouble, people say chess victor Byleth can kill you with mind-bullets, and hedge fund managers are diversifying into herbaceous borders. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. North Bernia's national animal is the Bunny, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Bernadetta Simping.

North Bernia is ranked 9,287^th in the world and 285^th in The East Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 96.37 Law-abiding Acts Per Hour.