by Max Barry

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Best Weather: 1,307th Most World Assembly Endorsements: 1,516th Most Influential: 1,817th
The Kingdom of
Father Knows Best State
Evil is always possible. Goodness is a difficulty.
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Noire Denholm

Population3.591 billion

LeaderThe All Powerful Monty Phugotuborn
FaithThe Dark Cult of Bothughachau

AnimalGreat Mock Lynx

The Kingdom of Noire Denholm is a massive, genial nation, ruled by The All Powerful Monty Phugotuborn with an iron fist, and notable for its national health service, vat-grown people, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 3.591 billion Noire Denholmians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gasselterboerveenschemond. The average income tax rate is 90.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Noire Denholmian economy, worth 642 trillion Skuls a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 178,893 Skuls, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

EULAs remind customers that "Private Mode" is a browser setting rather than a promise, the nation's universities are often mistaken for foreign embassies, people who have had childhood imaginary friends are told they can't ever be trusted with guns, and father-son fishing trips have been banned. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Noire Denholm's national animal is the Great Mock Lynx, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is The Dark Cult of Bothughachau.

Noire Denholm is ranked 164,475th in the world and 7,381st in the South Pacific for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring -13.76 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.

Best Weather: 1,307thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1,516thTop
Most Influential: 1,817thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,975thLongest Average Lifespans: 2,353rdMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 2,394thHealthiest Citizens: 3,132ndMost Inclusive: 3,310thMost Devout: 3,564thMost Cultured: 4,722ndMost Developed: 4,767thMost Subsidized Industry: 4,820thMost Scientifically Advanced: 5,097thHighest Poor Incomes: 5,107thLargest Information Technology Sector: 5,219thMost Cheerful Citizens: 5,745thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 5,776thLowest Crime Rates: 6,143rdLargest Governments: 6,486thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 6,658thSmartest Citizens: 7,340thHighest Average Incomes: 8,019thHighest Average Tax Rates: 8,046thMost Corrupt Governments: 8,315thTop
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 8,600thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 8,674thMost Efficient Economies: 8,959thLargest Publishing Industry: 11,375thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 12,238thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 12,758thLargest Welfare Programs: 13,834thMost Advanced Public Education: 14,713thNicest Citizens: 15,427thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 16,051st
Best Weather: 44th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 59th in the regionMost Devout: 65th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 68th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 73rd in the regionTop
Healthiest Citizens: 103rd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 106th in the regionMost Inclusive: 108th in the regionMost Cultured: 132nd in the regionMost Influential: 143rd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 148th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 149th in the regionMost Developed: 154th in the regionLargest Governments: 155th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 163rd in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 163rd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 164th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 174th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 178th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 182nd in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 189th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 191st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 192nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 197th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 205th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 206th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 276th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 287th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 324th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 339th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 343rd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 354th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 362nd in the regionTop
Most Advanced Public Education: 410th in the regionMost Stationary: 427th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 446th in the regionNudest: 523rd in the regionNicest Citizens: 549th in the regionLargest Populations: 584th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Noire Denholm, father-son fishing trips have been banned.
  • : Noire Denholm's influence in The South Pacific rose from "Page" to "Squire".
  • : Noire Denholm's influence in The South Pacific fell from "Squire" to "Page".
  • : Noire Denholm endorsed The Oppressed Peoples of Doomen.
  • : Noire Denholm was endorsed by The Oppressed Peoples of Doomen.
  • : Following new legislation in Noire Denholm, people who have had childhood imaginary friends are told they can't ever be trusted with guns.
  • : Following new legislation in Noire Denholm, the nation's universities are often mistaken for foreign embassies.
  • : Following new legislation in Noire Denholm, EULAs remind customers that "Private Mode" is a browser setting rather than a promise.
  • : Following new legislation in Noire Denholm, the carbon tax fund gladly supplies warm blankets when the poor can't pay their heating bills.
  • : Following new legislation in Noire Denholm, no personal detail is too tiny for the suede-denim census police.


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 113 » Curlyhoward, Techganet, Drugged Monkeys, Luddinlande, Dylar, Pencil Sharpeners 2, Quiescent, Tsunamy, FreeFishers, Qvait, Sandaoguo, Erinor, Farengeto, Kringalia, Darakin, Belschaft, Moreana, European Defense Organization, Nova Montron, Jehenna, Iristead, Bod Wareenaland, Rebel-topia, Hanguk-Nippon, Tsvetania, Aidenfieeld, Wyatonians, Native Inhabitants of Antarctica, Aywhyou, La Ascension, United States of Vietnam, Ridehale, Escevola, Volaworand, Sedunn, Nankyoku Tairiku, Calistan, Lotadia, Concrete Slab, 073 039 109 032 080 111 112 112 121, The Solar System Scope, Paranoia, Fighting Kawi Ninja, Rhetiaa, The naked people, Oxsania, Saciu, PEPEP, New Briantown, Jaxon, and 63 others.Great Andora, Barabarom, Aumeltopia, Beepee, UnShleepd, Silberne Wache, The National Corporation, Vincent Field, Macrothea, Shengtie, Isokenzar, Anachronolandia, Elveka, Grouu, Noveos, Awjan, Transcostria, Republitank, Kerlodia, Cuuldere, Liberated Lambergs, Lorora3, Kandorith, Rabbitz, USNE2018, Xandev, Kroumos, Darbor, Midand, The Libertarian Nation of Songrandine, Qairus, Stoniamera, Birdkeeper, Otaku Trash, State of Iowa, Maletora, Akindom, Land Without Shrimp, North Prarie, Mikole, Jahass, Wehraboos, The Filippinas, Federated Kingdoms of Brittania, Academy of Umbrellas, The Dragon Enclave, A Frog Dimension, Ostanasia, Ariankido, Dasko, Skriid, Slenrotros, Nowa Europa, San Anaben, Agalaesia, Sesteran, Amutien, Churumduul, New Juan Carlos Land, Viertes deutsches Koalitionsreich, Chocholand, Milvands, and Doomen.

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