The Rogue Nation of Nocoins is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Great Billfold with an iron fist, and notable for its smutty television, pith helmet sales, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 17.844 billion Cents-less Citizens are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Spirituality and Environment also on the agenda, while Education and Healthcare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the National Mint. The average income tax rate is 50.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Nocoinsian economy, worth a remarkable 3,447 trillion liars a year, is highly specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 193,182 liars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.5 times as much as the poorest.

Sanitary products are sold in brown paper at hairdressers' salons, the full weight of the law is being applied against hate speech, baby boys who pick up pink crayons are sent to a psychiatric ward, and bug burgers are extra crunchy. Crime is all-pervasive, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Nocoins's national animal is the Dragon Turtle, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Nocoins is ranked 2,407^th in the world and 30^th in The East Pacific for Most Patriotic, with 102.28 flags saluted per person per day.