by Max Barry

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Most Primitive: 50thMost Subsidized Industry: 51stMost Ignorant Citizens: 61st
The Oppressed Peoples of
Psychotic Dictatorship
living hand-to-mouth
Bad Bessie
Influence
Minnow
Region
Civil Rights
Rare
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Rare

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Next Meal

Population5.588 billion

CapitalThe Pasture
LeaderBad Bessie

CurrencyHelping Hands
AnimalHandsy Human

The Oppressed Peoples of Next Meal is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Bad Bessie with an iron fist, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, prohibition of alcohol, and feral children. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 5.588 billion Next Mealians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Administration, although Industry and Healthcare are also considered important, while Welfare receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Pasture. The average income tax rate is 97.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Next Mealian economy, worth a remarkable 1,462 trillion Helping Hands a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Retail, Furniture Restoration, Uranium Mining, and Basket Weaving. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 261,728 Helping Hands, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The hardest thing for a mining operation to dig through is government red tape, there's no such thing as a safe bet, morality classes are compulsory for all school students, and ad hoc militias patrol the streets in an effort to control rampant crime. Crime is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Next Meal's national animal is the Handsy Human, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Next Meal is ranked 253,405th in the world and 1,834th in 10000 Islands for Most Beautiful Environments, with 1.58 pounds of wildlife per square mile.

Top
1%
Most Primitive: 50thMost Subsidized Industry: 51stMost Ignorant Citizens: 61stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 84thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 134thMost Avoided: 211thMost Corrupt Governments: 213thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 217thHighest Crime Rates: 339thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 357thLargest Retail Industry: 372ndFattest Citizens: 435thMost Armed: 689thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,095thMost Advanced Public Transport: 1,131stMost Efficient Economies: 1,385thLargest Black Market: 1,570thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 2,153rdLargest Mining Sector: 2,313thHighest Poor Incomes: 2,439thTop
5%
Highest Average Tax Rates: 2,803rdMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 3,166thHighest Average Incomes: 3,269thRudest Citizens: 3,311thLargest Governments: 4,881stMost Valuable International Artwork: 5,532ndNudest: 6,969thMost Secular: 12,512thTop
10%
Highest Economic Output: 12,931stHighest Wealthy Incomes: 13,371stLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 18,033rdMost Influential: 21,327thMost Stationary: 21,737thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 23,065thMost Authoritarian: 24,516th
Top
1%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2nd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 3rd in the regionMost Avoided: 3rd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 4th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 6th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 8th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 8th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 8th in the regionFattest Citizens: 9th in the regionLargest Black Market: 14th in the regionMost Armed: 16th in the regionTop
5%
Most Advanced Public Transport: 19th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 24th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 26th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 32nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 36th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 45th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 52nd in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 61st in the regionNudest: 63rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 64th in the regionRudest Citizens: 71st in the regionLargest Governments: 78th in the regionTop
10%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 113th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 116th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 141st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 155th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 163rd in the regionMost Stationary: 168th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, ad hoc militias patrol the streets in an effort to control rampant crime.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, morality classes are compulsory for all school students.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, there's no such thing as a safe bet.
  • : Next Meal was reclassified from "Iron Fist Consumerists" to "Psychotic Dictatorship".
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, the hardest thing for a mining operation to dig through is government red tape.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, the freedom to be free is always just out of reach.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, newspapers cannot report anything about politicians without their explicit consent.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, politicians look weirdly alike.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, the most penniless demographics have by far the highest number of researchers per capita.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, public urination is on the increase.

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