The Big Tex Happy Taco Stands of NewTexas is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Big Tex with a fair hand, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, unlimited-speed roads, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 42.244 billion NewTexans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The minute, corrupt, liberal, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of NewAustin. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient NewTexan economy, worth an astonishing 16,850 trillion Fajita Tacoes a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Gambling, Book Publishing, and Soda Sales. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 398,893 Fajita Tacoes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Even religious militants can be swayed by the power of #love, the fate of the world literally rests on Big Tex's fingers, the regional delicacy of chocolate bombes is deadlier than an unexploded bomb, and teddy bear James Dean (aka "the Rebel Without the Claws") helps convince kids that candy cigarettes are cool. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. NewTexas's national animal is the Armadillo, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

NewTexas is ranked 272,564^th in the world and 172^nd in Texas for Most Patriotic, with 0.38 flags saluted per person per day.