The Holy Red Potato of New Jacobland is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by the Supreme Democratic Council with a fair hand, and remarkable for its deadly medical pandemics, free-roaming dinosaurs, and unlimited-speed roads. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 2.103 billion New Jacoblandians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, corrupt, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Industry, although Administration is also considered important, while Spirituality and Defense are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Avio. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 1.5%.

The frighteningly efficient New Jacoblandian economy, worth 309 trillion JacoBucks a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Soda Sales. Average income is an impressive 147,302 JacoBucks, with the richest citizens earning 7.7 times as much as the poorest.

Garbage bags floating down the river are churned up by man-made rapids, the richest citizens live in sheltered private citadels, town welcome signs list corporate sponsors, and social media sites prompt users to send birthday greetings to unresponsive nonagenarians. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. New Jacobland's national animal is the Chicken, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

New Jacobland is ranked 30,629^th in the world and 38^th in The Western Isles for Most Corrupt Governments, with 39.66 kickbacks per hour.