The Inactive Nation of New Eestiball is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Juan Quentin de la Salsa Verde with a fair hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and anti-smoking policies. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 5.166 billion Estonians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tallinn. The average income tax rate is 96.8%.

The frighteningly efficient New Eestiballian economy, worth 979 trillion propans a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 189,607 propans, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The family summer vacation has become a thing of the past following the introduction of the year-round school year, UFO sightings are listed daily in the morning news, the general public only knows their favorite politician's first name, and the slowest students feel vaguely targeted by their Mendelian Inheritance coursework. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. New Eestiball's national animal is the asleep echidna, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Yahlism.

New Eestiball is ranked 309,533^rd in the world and 1,228^th in Europe for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -12.26 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.