by Max Barry

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Largest Publishing Industry: 3,438th Largest Cheese Export Sector: 4,489th Highest Wealthy Incomes: 5,477th
The Prehistoric Glacial Herd of
Anarchy
Near the kraken sleepeth stirs coral and bone
Goliath Tusk
Influence
Powerbroker
Anachronistic Monumental Architecture
Region
Civil Rights
Superb
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Excellent

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Mastodon

Population1.675 billion

CapitalElephantine
LeaderGoliath Tusk
FaithNorse Black Magic

Currencykrone
AnimalWoolly Mammoth

The Prehistoric Glacial Herd of Mastodon is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Goliath Tusk with a fair hand, and renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, smutty television, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 1.675 billion Mastodons live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The medium-sized, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Elephantine. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 65.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Mastodon economy, worth 248 trillion kroner a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 148,541 kroner, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 497,700 per year while the poor average 32,927, a ratio of 15.1 to 1.

Dog owners proudly declare that their pups can predict when the mailman will arrive, the government is promoting multicultural values with the new 'Just Be Nice, OK?' initiative, constipated disaster survivors are rapidly learning that MRE is short for "Meal Requiring Enemas", and Goliath Tusk's new office is 6 by 8 feet with steel walls and a barred door. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Mastodon's national animal is the Woolly Mammoth, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Norse Black Magic.

Mastodon is ranked 29,660th in the world and 1st in Dinotopia for Highest Drug Use, scoring 93 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.

Top
5%
Largest Publishing Industry: 3,438thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 4,489thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 5,477thMost Cheerful Citizens: 6,877thLeast Corrupt Governments: 7,251stMost Developed: 7,389thTop
10%
Smartest Citizens: 8,344thLongest Average Lifespans: 9,161stMost Inclusive: 9,442ndMost Subsidized Industry: 9,450thMost Secular: 9,830thMost Cultured: 10,139thNicest Citizens: 10,567thMost Efficient Economies: 10,834thHealthiest Citizens: 11,363rdMost Scientifically Advanced: 11,530thMost Compassionate Citizens: 12,006thHighest Average Incomes: 12,724thLargest Agricultural Sector: 12,789thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 13,158thLargest Information Technology Sector: 13,362ndRudest Citizens: 13,393rdMost Beautiful Environments: 13,663rdMost Extensive Civil Rights: 13,737thLargest Retail Industry: 13,896thMost Advanced Public Education: 14,711th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, Goliath Tusk's new office is 6 by 8 feet with steel walls and a barred door.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, constipated disaster survivors are rapidly learning that MRE is short for "Meal Requiring Enemas".
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, the government is promoting multicultural values with the new 'Just Be Nice, OK?' initiative.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, dog owners proudly declare that their pups can predict when the mailman will arrive.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, some Mastodon athletes have defected to Blackacre after being denied the chance to compete in international sporting events.
  • : Mastodon was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Extensive Civil Rights.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, politicians who misplace decimal points on expense reports are fired for gross incompetence.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, 1% of global paper production is bound for the National Archive.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, sofas are perpetually on sales that Must End Soon.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, nature magazines featuring stick insects on their covers are sometimes mistaken for fashion magazines.

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