The Incorporated States of Maskellvania is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Mr Maskell with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, complete lack of prisons, and vat-grown people. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 10.435 billion Maskellvanians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Environment and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Corporate City of Maskell. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 7.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Maskellvanian economy, worth a remarkable 4,372 trillion Beers a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Retail, Uranium Mining, and Gambling. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 419,021 Beers, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,678,594 per year while the poor average 70,184, a ratio of 23.9 to 1.

Summer science camps are regularly raided by narcotics police, dangerous criminals are often 'accidentally' sent on one-way trips to Maxtopia, the dead fish in the national rivers aren't decomposing because even bacteria can't survive the levels of toxicity, and citizens try to pass off bottlecaps they found in their backyards as historical artifacts. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Maskellvania's national animal is the Bundy Bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Maskellism.

Maskellvania is ranked 2,587^th in the world and 71^st in Osiris for Most Patriotic, with 71.94 flags saluted per person per day.