The Kingdom of Malulota is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by King Ramadmis II with an iron fist, and renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, strictly enforced bedtime, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 11.518 billion Malulotans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mandora. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 34.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Malulotan economy, worth a remarkable 1,610 trillion Rodins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 139,805 Rodins, with the richest citizens earning 6.2 times as much as the poorest.

Military doctrine says not to open fire until you see the "beady little eyes" of Johnny Foreigner, it is typical to be greeted by a string of curse words in Malulotan restaurants, unshaven men are viewed with suspicion in courts of law, and dozens of viewers go online to hear whether a comma has been added to Clause 5 in Subsection B of Law 58375. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Malulota's national animal is the Hunadas Deer, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Tealism.

Malulota is ranked 39,827^th in the world and 14^th in Barbaria for Lowest Crime Rates, with 77.77 law-abiding acts per hour.