by Max Barry

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Largest Cheese Export Sector: 111thLargest Black Market: 114thHighest Average Incomes: 121st
The Awesomly Awesome Collective of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Never Give Up, Never get Malaria
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Political Freedom

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population14.968 billion

CapitalLa Ciudad Malororia
LeaderMalor Malakai
FaithVaccination Research

CurrencyTwice Reformed Maloric

The Awesomly Awesome Collective of Malororia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Malor Malakai with an iron fist, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, complete lack of prisons, and conspicuous electricity pylons. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 14.968 billion Malororians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Education, and Administration also on the agenda, while Welfare and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of La Ciudad Malororia. The average income tax rate is 99.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Malororian economy, worth a remarkable 9,640 trillion Twice Reformed Malorics a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 644,105 Twice Reformed Malorics, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,358,977 per year while the poor average 124,619, a ratio of 18.9 to 1.

Imprisonment is the leading cause of disownment, the government has begun selling heroin and ecstasy to help fund its projects, Malororian scientists are mixing chewing tobacco with bacon flavouring in an attempt to craft the perfect male snack, and research grant proposals read like political diatribes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Malororia's national animal is the Amoeba, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Vaccination Research.

Malororia is ranked 2,250th in the world and 102nd in Lazarus for Largest Retail Industry, scoring 25,800.11 on the Shrinkwrap Consignment Productivity Index.

Largest Cheese Export Sector: 111thLargest Black Market: 114thHighest Average Incomes: 121stMost Patriotic: 171stMost Corrupt Governments: 206thLargest Agricultural Sector: 229thLargest Insurance Industry: 255thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 277thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 324thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 331stHighest Wealthy Incomes: 333rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 393rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 399thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 417thLargest Governments: 528thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 577thHighest Economic Output: 612thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 637thLowest Crime Rates: 655thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 702ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 819thLargest Mining Sector: 890thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,026thHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,034thMost Secular: 1,066thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,199thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 1,234thMost Subsidized Industry: 1,284thMost Advanced Public Education: 1,653rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1,669thMost Advanced Public Transport: 1,696thSmartest Citizens: 1,708thMost Efficient Economies: 1,843rdLargest Retail Industry: 2,250thTop
Most Valuable International Artwork: 3,124thMost Scientifically Advanced: 3,370thNudest: 3,761stRudest Citizens: 3,844thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 4,513thLargest Publishing Industry: 5,615thLargest Gambling Industry: 5,810thHighest Poor Incomes: 7,457thFattest Citizens: 9,221stMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 9,601stMost Conservative: 10,870thTop
Most Developed: 14,174thLargest Populations: 18,904thMost Beautiful Environments: 19,478thMost Authoritarian: 21,357thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 23,365th
Highest Average Incomes: 6th in the regionMost Patriotic: 7th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 7th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 9th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 11th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 11th in the regionLargest Black Market: 11th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 12th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 14th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 15th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 17th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 17th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 19th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 20th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 20th in the regionLargest Governments: 21st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 22nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 27th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 28th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 33rd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 34th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 36th in the regionMost Secular: 38th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 39th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 43rd in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 43rd in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 45th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 47th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 54th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 63rd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 66th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 70th in the regionTop
Most Advanced Public Transport: 96th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 102nd in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 116th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 144th in the regionRudest Citizens: 159th in the regionNudest: 159th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 213th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 248th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 277th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 342nd in the regionMost Conservative: 367th in the regionTop
Fattest Citizens: 458th in the regionLargest Populations: 513th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 536th in the regionMost Stationary: 546th in the regionMost Influential: 611th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 770th in the regionMost Developed: 796th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 803rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Malororia was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Conservative.
  • : Following new legislation in Malororia, research grant proposals read like political diatribes.
  • : Following new legislation in Malororia, Malororian scientists are mixing chewing tobacco with bacon flavouring in an attempt to craft the perfect male snack.
  • : Following new legislation in Malororia, the government has begun selling heroin and ecstasy to help fund its projects.
  • : Following new legislation in Malororia, imprisonment is the leading cause of disownment.
  • : Malororia was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Following new legislation in Malororia, elections are outlawed and a hairstylist has recently received a government appointment.
  • : Following new legislation in Malororia, it is rumoured that Malor Malakai uses a magic 8-ball to make policy decisions.
  • : Following new legislation in Malororia, opposition party MPs campaign shirtless to show off their numerous lash scars.
  • : Following new legislation in Malororia, the only legal elections are for student body president.


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