by Max Barry

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The Borderline of
Left-wing Utopia

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Who is Tom?

Uhhh...I'm a/an;

(1. Arizonan male, typically lives between Flagstaff and Phoenix, occasionally a few other places in the state, it be like that.

(2. Distance swimmer, fan of open water events. Typically found swimming laps whenever possible.

(3. Avid hiker, always hiking bruh.

(4. Fan of fiction writing, cartography, political science, language learning, golf, and uhhh rowdy social occasions tend to be my primary hobbies.

(5. Nature lover, frequently found with a beer and sketchbook out in the pine forest or desert.

(6. Fanatic for steak, bacon, pastrami, really any sort of red meat.

(7. Walking contradiction, owing to the fact that I'm skinny as sh*t despite my copious consumption of red meat and beer.

(8. Soon to be teacher.

(9. Man with an expensive taste and low-income.

(10. That one hipster *ouchebag who tells you about his favorite flannel and why your favorite indie band actually sold out, thus negating it's very indieness.

(11. Sl*t for Wes Anderson films, alternative rock, with a raging hate-b*ner of any drivel Bruce Springsteen has put out. F*ck New Jersey.

(12. Overburdened and absurdly stressed out university student who spends his few precious hours of free time either in the pool, doing inane sh*t with friends, or posting on NSG for sh*ts and giggles.

(13. Caffeine addict who runs almost solely on coffee, red bull, and nicotine pouches.

(14. Decent individual who is probably just trying his best.

I hope this was informative.