The Republic of Lolingia is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Ojisan with an iron fist, and notable for its compulsory military service, smutty television, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 1.859 billion Lolingians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry, Law & Order, and Education are also considered important, while Social Policy and Spirituality are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Moe. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 66.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Lolingian economy, worth 397 trillion lolis a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 213,677 lolis, with the richest citizens earning 7.2 times as much as the poorest.

Prime commercial land is being swamped with archaeological teams, the term "Native Lolingian" has been redefined as anyone with the same skin color as the majority, money can't buy happiness but it can buy immunity to prosecution, and Lolingia is increasingly belligerent on the international stage. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lolingia's national animal is the loli, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Eugenics.

Lolingia is ranked 66,370^th in the world and 2^nd in Holy Utopian Empire for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 4,017.51 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.