The Armed Republic of Lingu is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Mirko with an iron fist, and notable for its zero percent divorce rate, aversion to nipples, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 1.816 billion Linguans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. The average income tax rate is 77.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Linguan economy, worth 387 trillion hounds a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 213,281 hounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Fake beard sales are on the rise amongst female commuters, ancient antique swords have had their blades replaced with latex boffer LARP replicas, everyone apparently sends Mirko hair-filled lockets, offers to die heroically, and poetic desires to co-parent a child, and political loyalty is enforced by way of chemical addiction. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lingu's national animal is the bloodhound, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Lingu is ranked 15,213^th in the world and 484^th in The East Pacific for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring 8,659.25 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.