The Republic of Lincoln Village is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by King Tut with an even hand, and notable for its otherworldly petting zoo, ubiquitous missile silos, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 6.315 billion Lincoln Villageans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, with Administration, Education, and Industry also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Milwaukee. The average income tax rate is 59.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Lincoln Villagean economy, worth a remarkable 1,600 trillion Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 253,451 Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

The richest individuals apparently buy nothing but noodles and toilet paper, political gridlock ensues as even the most innocuous legislation is vetoed by the Supreme Court for potential civil rights violations, criminals rejoice in the streets as the entire police force is sent away on a training retreat, and sexually-starved male dinosaurs terrorise tourists during weekly breakouts from Mesozoic Park. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Lincoln Village's national animal is the Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Lincoln Village is ranked 3,509^th in the world and 137^th in the South Pacific for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 8,285.47 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.