The Federation of Lauchenoiria is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Josephine Alvarez with a fair hand, and remarkable for its infamous sell-swords, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 6.466 billion Lauchenoirians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The large, outspoken government prioritizes Education, although Environment, Welfare, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Spirituality and Defense receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Buttercity. The average income tax rate is 89.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Lauchenoirian economy, worth 865 trillion Gold Cookies a year, is highly specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 133,809 Gold Cookies, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Exceptionally healthy police officers can sprint after crooks for hours on end, weird kids who eat bugs are breaking the law, jabbing a baby's bottle at officials gets parents waved straight through immigration, and vaccinations are mandatory. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lauchenoiria's national animal is the butterfly, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Atheism.

Lauchenoiria is ranked 3,372^nd in the world and 10^th in International Democratic Union for Longest Average Lifespans, with 93 Years.