by Max Barry

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Most Authoritarian: 5,549thMost Ignorant Citizens: 5,969thMost Income Equality: 10,868th
The Free-ish Land of
Psychotic Dictatorship
The Light Must Shine
Most Exalted Leader
Research Officer
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population4.39 billion

LeaderMost Exalted Leader

Animalbig-horned sheep

The Free-ish Land of Lampastan is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Most Exalted Leader with an iron fist, and renowned for its frequent executions, compulsory military service, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 4.39 billion Lampastanians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized morass — juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bulb. The average income tax rate is 71.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but stagnant Lampastanian economy, worth 64.2 trillion bones a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Furniture Restoration, Tourism, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 14,624 bones, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government is rumored to hire body doubles whose full-time jobs are to cry at public events, war criminals are given full state funerals, libraries have replaced overdue book fines with mandatory mental health assessments, and tax evaders are regularly visited by agents of the Lampastan Blood Tithe. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lampastan's national animal is the big-horned sheep, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Statolatry.

Lampastan is ranked 177,377th in the world and 11th in The Flying Spaghetti Monster Lands for Highest Wealthy Incomes, with 15,741.98 Standard Monetary Units.

Most Authoritarian: 5,549thMost Ignorant Citizens: 5,969thTop
Most Income Equality: 10,868thMost Devout: 11,925thMost Extreme: 15,714thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 16,667th
Most Valuable International Artwork: 1st in the regionMost Extreme: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Authoritarian: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


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