by Max Barry

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Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 277th Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 468th Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 728th
The Armed Republic of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Progress over pleasure
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population10.733 billion

CapitalKyroistan City


The Armed Republic of Kyroistan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Leader with an iron fist, and renowned for its infamous sell-swords, zero percent divorce rate, and avant-garde cinema. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 10.733 billion Kyroistanians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kyroistan City. The average income tax rate is 96.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Kyroistanian economy, worth a remarkable 3,030 trillion Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Woodchip Exports, Arms Manufacturing, and Furniture Restoration. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 282,308 Pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.6 times as much as the poorest.

Citizens know never to accept cookies from strangers, disadvantaged youths often commit felonies to enhance their educational prospects, engineers preemptively order lawyers after every power cut, and five-year-olds who refuse to line up on command get gold stars. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kyroistan's national animal is the Rabbit, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Kyroistan is ranked 1,442nd in the world and 1st in Middle East for Most Corrupt Governments, with 292.69 Kickbacks Per Hour.

Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 277thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 468thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 728thMost Advanced Public Education: 767thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 833rdLargest Black Market: 1,040thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,071stLowest Crime Rates: 1,291stMost Corrupt Governments: 1,442ndMost Avoided: 1,505thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,562ndTop
Most Advanced Public Transport: 1,897thHighest Average Incomes: 2,038thLargest Mining Sector: 2,129thLargest Agricultural Sector: 2,238thLargest Governments: 2,391stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2,561stMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,675thMost Scientifically Advanced: 2,801stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3,005thHighest Average Tax Rates: 3,185thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3,352ndHighest Economic Output: 3,583rdSmartest Citizens: 3,830thRudest Citizens: 4,077thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4,282ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 4,927thHighest Poor Incomes: 5,396thMost Stationary: 6,713thTop
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 9,323rdMost Secular: 9,490thMost Influential: 10,600thHealthiest Citizens: 14,695thMost Efficient Economies: 14,917thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 14,970thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 15,100thLargest Retail Industry: 16,521st
Most Advanced Public Education: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionTop
Most Scientifically Advanced: 2nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 2nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 2nd in the regionMost Secular: 2nd in the regionMost Avoided: 2nd in the regionMost Stationary: 2nd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3rd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 3rd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 3rd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 3rd in the regionLargest Governments: 3rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Kyroistan, five-year-olds who refuse to line up on command get gold stars.
  • : Following new legislation in Kyroistan, engineers preemptively order lawyers after every power cut.
  • : Following new legislation in Kyroistan, disadvantaged youths often commit felonies to enhance their educational prospects.
  • : Following new legislation in Kyroistan, citizens know never to accept cookies from strangers.
  • : Following new legislation in Kyroistan, destitute AIs lurk around online bulletin boards begging for spare Pounds.
  • : Following new legislation in Kyroistan, funeral directors are frequently looking at their watches during funerals.
  • : Kyroistan was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Retail Industry.
  • : Following new legislation in Kyroistan, the number of students attending university has reached a record high.
  • : Following new legislation in Kyroistan, all major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras.
  • : Following new legislation in Kyroistan, escargots have lost their charm ever since they started to be called 'cooked land snails'.


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