The United Kingdoms of Krainin is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Queen Alexis II with an even hand, and renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, devout population of 8.818 billion Krainians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Seplan. The average income tax rate is 72.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but sluggish Krainian economy, worth 154 trillion Krainin Pounds a year, is quite specialized and led by the Automobile Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Cheese Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 17,520 Krainin Pounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nationalistic national anthem inspires citizens to literally spit at foreigners, councils up and down the country wrangle over legal matters, private law firms are unheard of, and calling dibs is an unalienable right. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Krainin's national animal is the King Snake, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Protestantism.

Krainin is ranked 109,957^th in the world and 29^th in New Ausozera for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 361.25 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.