The Suppressed squirrels of Klopswurst is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by fairy king amne with an iron fist, and remarkable for its deadly medical pandemics, smutty television, and labour-free parental leave. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 39.485 billion worthless Klopswurstians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Education, with Environment, Healthcare, and Administration also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Defense aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Blutwurst. The average income tax rate is 82.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Klopswurstian economy, worth a remarkable 7,888 trillion golden Klops a year, is highly specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Soda Sales, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 199,774 golden Klops, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Country folk are sent to obligatory boarding schools to learn how to be civilized, Fairy king amne's Twitcher account is typically used to share Schnitzeltier memes rather than government policy, Klopswurstian watches list strained wrists as a common side effect, and businesses are abandoning the city centre because of the lack of transport connections. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Klopswurst's national animal is the Schnitzeltier, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is obedience.

Klopswurst is ranked 311,671^st in the world and 66^th in International Democratic Union for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring -10.86 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.