by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 357th Largest Insurance Industry: 463rd Largest Black Market: 626th
The Glorious Ogre Khanate of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population15.268 billion

Capitalthe ogre city of Kernen
Leaderthe mighty Supreme Khan Juk i'Behemoti
Faiththe State Church of Kernen

Currencydissenter's ear

The Glorious Ogre Khanate of Kernen is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by the mighty Supreme Khan Juk i'Behemoti with an iron fist, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, compulsory military service, and digital currency. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 15.268 billion ogres are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the ogre city of Kernen. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 76.5%.

The frighteningly efficient an ogre economy, worth a remarkable 4,743 trillion dissenter's ears a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Automobile Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 310,700 dissenter's ears, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 915,678 per year while the poor average 82,956, a ratio of 11.0 to 1.

Acrimonious legal battles result during divorce proceedings, 90% of active duty KAF personnel have been laid off and replaced by robot kill-drones, a recent political speech drew the ire of nerds everywhere after the speaker claimed that Darth Vader was Harry Potter's father, and the mighty Supreme Khan Juk i'Behemoti's recent "I have a dream that we will fight them by raking muck on the beaches" speech seems a little derivative to many. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force. Kernen's national animal is the Behemoth, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is the State Church of Kernen.

Kernen is ranked 1,609th in the world and 35th in Confederation of Corrupt Dictators for Most Advanced Defense Forces, scoring 21,966.69 on the Total War Preparedness Rating.

Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 357thLargest Insurance Industry: 463rdLargest Black Market: 626thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 650thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 788thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 880thLargest Mining Sector: 984thMost Efficient Economies: 1,128thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1,237thHighest Average Incomes: 1,379thHighest Economic Output: 1,546thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,608thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,609thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,624thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,635thTop
Most Corrupt Governments: 1,840thLowest Crime Rates: 1,951stFattest Citizens: 2,020thMost Avoided: 2,201stLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,470thMost Devout: 2,515thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 3,240thLargest Governments: 3,665thLargest Gambling Industry: 4,491stMost Subsidized Industry: 4,780thLargest Agricultural Sector: 5,807thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 7,167thMost Ignorant Citizens: 8,302ndTop
Largest Populations: 8,948thLargest Retail Industry: 9,031stMost Scientifically Advanced: 9,136thMost Advanced Public Transport: 10,230thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 13,000thHighest Poor Incomes: 14,063rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 14,100thLargest Information Technology Sector: 14,201stHighest Average Tax Rates: 16,347thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 17,127thMost Conservative: 17,378th
Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 6th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 7th in the regionTop
Highest Economic Output: 8th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 9th in the regionLargest Black Market: 9th in the regionLargest Populations: 10th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 11th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 12th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 13th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 15th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 16th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 16th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 17th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 17th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 21st in the regionFattest Citizens: 22nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 22nd in the regionLargest Governments: 27th in the regionMost Avoided: 27th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 29th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 29th in the regionMost Devout: 29th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 35th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 36th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 37th in the regionTop
Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 40th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 47th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 53rd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 55th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 63rd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 74th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Cheese Export Sector.
  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Cheese Export Sector.
  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Highest Wealthy Incomes.
  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry.
  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Highest Average Tax Rates.
  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Ignorant Citizens.
  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Ignorant Citizens.
  • : Kernen was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Conservative.


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