The Constitutional Monarchy of Kaystone is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Queen Kaylee with an iron fist, and renowned for its public floggings, complete lack of prisons, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 14.906 billion Kaystoneans are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sealand. The average income tax rate is 47.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Kaystonean economy, worth a remarkable 6,601 trillion Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Retail. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 442,869 Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.

Cyclists spend more time unlocking their bicycles than they do cycling, citizens ask "how many crooks could a nunchuck hook if a nun had nunchucks too?", photographers can be found hiding behind the curtains in Queen Kaylee's bedroom, and burgers often list "miscellaneous meats" in their ingredients. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kaystone's national animal is the Liger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Islam.

Kaystone is ranked 1,669^th in the world and 1^st in United Kaystone for Lowest Crime Rates, with 151.52 law-abiding acts per hour.