The Republic of Kalosia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Edgard Solem with an even hand, and notable for its anti-smoking policies, complete lack of prisons, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 23.381 billion Kalosians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Monterra. The average income tax rate is 74.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Kalosian economy, worth a remarkable 1,176 trillion Crowns a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 50,320 Crowns, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Legal contracts aren't worth the paper they're written on, judicial robes are the country's hottest fashion trend, one-man canoes fitted with the latest tracking technology leave no room for one man, and guide dogs for the blind have been seen using government websites. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kalosia's national animal is the Dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is no religion as Kalosia is secular.

Kalosia is ranked 285,040^th in the world and 95^th in Rushmore for Largest Mining Sector, scoring -18.97 on the Blue Sky Asbestos Index.