The Most Serene Republic of Kaiserholt is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Censor Perpetuo Elena Lampronius with an iron fist, and remarkable for its public floggings, pith helmet sales, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 14.759 billion Holtii are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The tiny, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Caer Lochweald. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 3.3%.

The frighteningly efficient of the Holt economy, worth a remarkable 2,275 trillion Equuses a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 154,204 Equuses, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 514,099 per year while the poor average 34,438, a ratio of 14.9 to 1.

Politicians frequently make unusual poses during speeches in hopes of inspiring the next internet fad, the military conducts 'training exercises' in prisons, government theft from poor artists to give to rich allies has been dubbed the "reverse Robin Hood" policy, and fifteen-year-olds cannot walk younger siblings to school without a professional Childcare and Education Certificate. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Kaiserholt's national animal is the Silver Fox, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Universal Temple of the Olympian Apostás.

Kaiserholt is ranked 4,919^th in the world and 14^th in The Land of Kings and Emperors for Highest Economic Output, with 2,275 trillion Standard Monetary Units.