The Most Serene Republic of Kaiserholt is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Censor Perpetuo Elena Lampronius with an iron fist, and notable for its enslaved workforce, pith helmet sales, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 16.239 billion Holtii are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The tiny, corrupt government prioritizes Industry, although Defense, Law & Order, and Education are also considered important, while Spirituality and Social Policy aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Caer Lochweald. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.0%.

The frighteningly efficient of the Holt economy, worth a remarkable 2,554 trillion Equuses a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 157,296 Equuses, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 884,298 per year while the poor average 13,825, a ratio of 64.0 to 1.

Picnickers are lucky if a few wasps are the only animals that trouble them, the 'sing-a-long with Censor Perpetuo Elena Lampronius' album is a popular souvenir, billions are being spent on a new island airport, and the national security service are a bunch of crooks. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Kaiserholt's national animal is the Silver Fox, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Universal Temple of the Olympian Apostás.

Kaiserholt is ranked 52,236^th in the world and 99^th in The Land of Kings and Emperors for Most Avoided, scoring 75.15 on the Kardashian Reflex Score.