The Traffic Snarl of Jerzylvania is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by -insert desired name here- with an iron fist, and renowned for its complete lack of prisons, pith helmet sales, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 15.485 billion Jerzylvanians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Administration, and Industry also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the only town without representation. The average income tax rate is 69.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Jerzylvanian economy, worth a remarkable 1,720 trillion deciduous tree leaves a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 111,103 deciduous tree leaves, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.

Belligerent citizens shoot at passing clouds for 'violating their airspace', the state believes that children are what you make of them, crackheads chase drug-loaded drones in hopes of a lucky drop, and the police have been known to wiretap confessional boxes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Jerzylvania's national animal is the clock face and its national religion is varies per individuals.

Jerzylvania is ranked 43,331^st in the world and 1^st in Democracy for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 4,116.44 on the Gilded Widget Scale.