The Republic of Izern 39 is a huge, orderly nation, notable for its frequent executions, punitive income tax rates, and restrictive gun laws. The cynical population of 868 million Izern 39ians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 54.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Izern 39ian economy, worth 58.5 trillion francs a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Woodchip Exports industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Retail, and Cheese Exports. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 67,432 francs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government regrets to say that it is forced to make cuts to citizens, wildlife near farms is slowly becoming extinct, singles on the dating scene no longer worry about looking their age, and the nation's diplomatic missives are now delivered via sniper rifle. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Izern 39's national animal is the falcon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Izern 39 is ranked 74,117^th in the world and 23^rd in New Izern Farm Thingymabob for Most Cultured, scoring 69 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.